For this year’s marriage week, we were asked to share our tips for healthy marriage in the home:
Your relationship with each other is the most important part of your home so create an environment that will enable your relationship to flourish. What will make your your house feel home to each other. If possible invest in the best bed you can afford—you’re going to spend a lot of time in it! Cultivate romance by adding candles, soft lighting, soft furnishings and music.
Don’t get caught up with needing your house to be perfect. We’d all like beautiful ‘show’ homes but don’t wait to get to this point before you invite people into your home. It’s your relationship that turns a house into a home. If you are welcoming and hospitable, people will see that rather than a bit of untidiness. If you’re warm and loving to each other and to others, people will be drawn to that rather than what your house looks like. Building work can take a while; don’t miss out on time to connect with others.
Take a break from your phone
Agree boundaries over screen time. We’ve all done it, our partner is chatting away and we realise we heard nothing they said because we were checking out a hilarious meme on Facebook. Or checked our emails for that ‘really important’ work email before we go to sleep. How much are we missing out on because we’re too absorbed by screen time? Take time to be honest with each other about realistic boundaries. Perhaps consider leaving your devices downstairs when you go to bed or setting them to do not disturb at certain times of day.
Do a temperature check
Who or what sets the atmosphere of your house? Is there a project in the house that is causing stress? Are there differences between you that need talking through; perhaps one of you is tidy and the other is messy—can you meet in the middle? Who else lives in your house? If you’re parents, children can sometimes cause friction in your relationship but there are some great support resources available. Who comes into your house? Are they people that make you happy or people who stress you out? Talk about how you can address some of these areas and lift the atmosphere of the house.
Sync your diaries
Talk about how your weeks, months, years look. Some of us live super busy lives and never have time to rest. Others are not so busy and would like to be doing more. Maybe our house is always full of people and we yearn for quiet or perhaps we’d like a bit more going on. Look at your diaries and plan in time for people, activity and time for rest. Sharing your diaries online is a fantastic way of ensuring you don’t double book.
You can read tips on other areas of married life on the Marriage Week website.